how the light gets in

by Andrea Smithberger
how the light gets in
  • November 1: Honoring
  • Day 2: Signaling
  • Day 3: Revealing
  • DAY 4: Reminding
  • Day 5: Reflecting
  • Day 6: Changing
  • Day 7: Surrounding
  • Day 8: Healing
  • Day 9: Filtering
  • Day 10: Spreading
  • Day 11: Unveiling
  • Day 12: Distinguishing
  • Day 13: Challenging
  • Day 14: Nourishing
  • Day 15: Unassuming
  • Day 16: Leading
  • Day 17: Delighting
  • Day 18: Reaching
  • Day 19: Shining
  • Day 20: Reviving
  • Day 21: Growing
  • Day 22: Comforting
  • Day 23: Holding Space
  • Day 24: Beckoning
  • Day 25: Stunning
  • Day 26: Igniting
  • Day 28: Introducing
  • November 2020
  • Author Archives: How the Light Gets In

    • One Egg Omelettes

      Posted at 2:15 pm by How the Light Gets In, on February 5, 2021

      Crack an egg into a bowl. Whisk with salt and pepper. Melt a pat of butter in a skillet and pour in the egg. It doesn’t take long for the pan full of egg to go from sloshy to solid, soft and yellow. As quickly as it turns, flip it just in time to put half a slice of American cheese on it. Then, carefully slide it onto a blue plate, folding one half over the other making a half moon shape.

      I would repeat this same process 5 times (if not more) making “one egg omelettes” for the kids each morning around 10:00.

      I made one egg omelettes for days, weeks at a time when the pandemic started.

      Deep down, I think I was trying to schedule something routine in our home where there was suddenly none. And, I think I was trying to fill their mouths so they couldn’t ask me questions because I had no answers.

      I was trying to love them through the global shutdown one omelette at a time.

      While their tummies were being fed, this momma was becoming exhausted. You can guess how that ended – Me screaming one morning, “I don’t want to make these anymore! Make your own food! Don’t you know how to make your own food? You’re all old enough!” Nice.

      I, myself, had created that scheduled need for MEEEE for the kids. And now I was yelling about it.

      Late summer of 2020, our oldest moved out to start college. I wrote about Launching Lauren and loving her and wondering what else I needed to teach her before she headed out into the world.

      As it turns out, I needed a combination of the global pandemic and Lauren’s launch to learn to love in a different way.

      Making one egg omelettes, while delicious and nutritious, were not preparing my crew for the world. You might be thinking, “Seriously Andrea. Does there have to be a lesson in the omelettes?” Buuuuuuut, yes, there does, there is! I’m learning that teaching them HOW to make omelettes is more powerful than simply serving them over and over.

      Hear me out.

      Early pandemic, I was at least one thing they could count on. I was the helper, the fixer, the distraction. My kids were fed. And I was serving them a daily portion of enabling and controlling on a blue plate, one egg omelette at a time.

      Good intentions. Not so good out outcomes.

      So, this week we started something new. Daily Lunch service provided by (drumroll) the kids. Each kid takes a day of the week to make lunches for mom and siblings. It’s up to the kid in charge to decide the menu and prepare it during their lunch break to make sure there’s enough for everyone.

      Joseph has a salad bar in mind. Lily loves cream cheese and raspberry jelly sandwiches with a side of carrots and hummus. Luci will probably make one of those Tik Tok Tortilla wrap hack things [like this https://www.realsimple.com/food-recipes/cooking-tips-techniques/quesadilla-cooking-hack-tiktok ] And John? No clue. But that’s not my problem.

      The planning, the time, the effort to prepare a meal for their brothers and sisters and me is on them – not me. They become the one in charge. They will take turns learning what it takes to think of others. They will hear criticism and praise (hopefully kindly) and learn to accept it.

      While the world spins and cable news channels spin ‘supposed’ facts even faster; the kids will learn the value of independent choices and how they affect others. Don’t you think?

      The goal is for them to learn stuff like responsibility and accountability rather than munch down a blue plate of enabling with a side of controlling.

      This being a mom thing is exhausting. I need a nap. Now, there’s an opportunity to be an example in self-care, but, I’m still learning that one too.

      [Any tips on simple lunch ideas or handling global anxiety questions for 7-18 year olds or scheduling mommy care welcome in comments.]

      Posted in February 2021 | 0 Comments | Tagged enabling, How the Light Gets In, independence, Kids, lessons, lunch, Mom, one egg omelettes, Responsibility, self-care, tik tok tortilla wrap hack
    • As you go

      Posted at 8:17 am by How the Light Gets In, on January 30, 2021

      I’ve read and heard Bible stories my whole life.  And still, every now and then a detail pulls me with an invitation to look again.

      Today, the invitation comes from the story of Jesus healing the Lepers in the Gospel of Luke.

      It goes like this:

      A group of 10 men with leprosy call out to Jesus as he was coming close.

      “Master heal us.”

      He answered,

      “Go present yourself to the priest.”

      They went.

      Super simple: They Ask, He Answers, They Go.

      It’s verse 14 that is pulling at me though.

      “As they went, they were cleansed.”

      Recap: They ask for healing, Jesus says go to the priests and they start walking. Do you think they walked away in grateful confidence that, YES, it would be the priests who would cure them – “Of course, why didn’t we think of the priests? Let’s go!” 

      But, the priests wouldn’t be the ones to clean their infections, restore their wounds or give them the wholeness they needed. 

      “As they WENT, they were cleansed.”

      I wonder what the Lepers heard “as they went” through town – screams of fear from onlookers, angry threats from neighbors? I don’t know but I do know they kept going.

      Back then, people with leprosy had to wear bells around their necks. The clanging would warn others of their presence giving them time to get out of the way.

      I wonder about the people hearing the bells. Would the ones who usually stared from behind a curtain peek out just in time to see? Would they stare long enough to witness the miracle of 10 grotesque, outcast, hurting lepers HEALING “as they went”?!?

      The bell around your neck; it might be old shame, might be doubt, could be regret, even anger. The clanging will be loud as you take your first step. I know this to be true for me but keep going. And, what other people do as you respond to Jesus – whether they slowly disappear or make their disapproval loud or laugh in judgment – is up to them. You keep going.

      It’s super simple, right? You Ask, He Answers, You Go.

      It’s just both; simple and not so simple.

      Maybe you’re too afraid to ask by yourself. [There were ten lepers in the same kind of pain and they asked together.] Then, get yourself a circle of people and ask! Maybe that’s your first request: “Jesus, I need a circle of people who know me, love me, hear the bells clinking and clanging around my neck and push me to keep going.”

      Maybe you have a hunch what direction you need to be heading in that relationship, that job, that decision; but the bells are too much: “Jesus, you know my heart. And I think I know the way to go but the fear/doubt/criticism/worry/shame/regret is so loud. Help my feet to keep going.”

      Ask. Listen. Expect the bells and the outside noise. Keep going.

      Now, off you go.

      Posted in JANUARY 2021, Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged bells, healing, How the Light Gets In, Keep Going, Lepers, Luke 17:11-19
    • my response

      Posted at 2:31 pm by How the Light Gets In, on January 8, 2021

      Fight or Flight: two basic responses to stress.

      Which did you choose January 6th?

      To be honest, I don’t usually choose to fight or run away. I freeze. Very mature. I’m working on me though.

      I woke up feeling like I don’t want to fight, don’t want to flee, don’t want to be stuck either. I do feel the need to face “it”. [For the record, I’m not going into the “it” because “it” is different for all of us.] There’s a rumbling for vulnerability in this country. And we need to address it, one by one, for the good of the whole.

      Our country is a mess. I believe there’s a calling out there for you and me right now. We don’t need a new leader to fix it. You, me, we can all be leaders in our families, our circles for change. I need you. You need me. WE need to work side by side, extending Grace to each other while we respond to the call.

      So, how do we do it?

      Rather than fighting or running away or freezing:

      1. FACE it.

      Are you angry, hurt, sad? With the Church? Racism? Trump? Biden? Covid-19? the mask? White people? Karens? Fox News? CNN? God? WHO? WHY?

      Ask God to untangle the mess inside. “Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” Psalm 139:23-24

      While you’ve got God working in there, ask Him to show you all the gifts you have too (you’ll be needing those).

      2. SIT with it.

      Push past the anger to the real feeling: Is it fear? Fear of the Unknown? Do you feel exposed? Uncertain? Vulnerable? Guilty? Dumb? Territorial? Wrong? Shameful?

      SIT WITH IT.

      Isaiah 30:15 says, “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength.” There is strength to be found in stillness.

      While you’re sitting with all the things; invite Jesus in please.

      “Come Lord Jesus” – you say the word and He will be there beside you.

      To have the powerful companionship of God – your God who knows tears and injustice and isolation and hurt- while sitting with all of the stuff makes all the difference. Inviting a holy presence into the process will transform you. Promise.

      3. NAME it.

      Named must your Fear be before banish it you can.

      There are three strategies that I’ve seen work to transform always knowing into always learning.

      1. Name the issue. It’s a tough conversation, but clear is kind: I’d like for you to work on your curiosity and critical thinking skills. You’re often quick with answers, which can be helpful, but not as helpful as having the right questions, which is how you’ll grow as a leader. We can work together on this.

      Knowers often have a lot of people talking behind their backs, and that’s unkind.

      2. Make learning “curiosity skills” a priority. Some people may be perceived as naturally curious, and others need to be taught how to be more curious. Don’t assume people aren’t curious because they don’t care. They may not know how to be curious.

      3. Acknowledge and reward great questions and instances of “I don’t know, but I’d like to find out” as daring  leadership  behaviors. The  big  shift  here is from wanting to “be right” to wanting to “get it right.”

      We define grounded confidence as curiosity + the willingness to rumble with vulnerability + practice. While armor is our greatest barrier to being brave, grounded confidence is the heart of daring leadership.

      *Adapted from Dare to Lead: Brave Work, Tough Conversations, Whole Hearts (2018)

      Look. You, me, we BELONG here right now. God put us here today and so we will be equipped for the work ahead.

      I, for one (while slightly terrified) am also excited to think that if I do the work well, I can bring some change to this world. What fills me even more hope is the idea that you are here at the same time! And if we do the work well TOGETHER – WOW!

      Let’s be terrified and excited TOGETHER! WE are here for a purpose. You are meant to be here. Don’t throw your story away in anger or violence or stereotypes, we are worth much more than that.

      Come Lord Jesus.

      Sit beside us in our fear and anger until we can acknowledge what’s in our hearts. Jesus, you promised to be with us in the storm. And this, Lord, is a shit storm. Beyond the promise, you are inviting us to “the other side” of the storm. I pray we say yes to the invitation.

      Help us embrace the love and patience and wisdom and humility and goodness and mercy and grace you’ve woven into each one of us. I pray we learn to accept our faults and to receive our gifts. Thank you for my brothers and sisters who are as messed up as I am and want better.

      Fix our eyes on you Jesus. Amen.

      Posted in JANUARY 2021, Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged always learning, Biden, Brene Brown, Clear is kind, Fight or Flight, How the Light Gets In, Isaiah 30:15, Jesus, leader, Psalm 139:23-24, Racism, Revelation 22:20, Trump, Yoda
    • Jesus

      Posted at 1:20 pm by How the Light Gets In, on January 3, 2021

      All the Christmas decorations here are packed away (actually, maybe they’re piled in a corner of the basement).

      The house looks so bare. There’s no more glitter or garlands.

      Today, in our faith, we celebrate the Feast of the Epiphany. It marks the end of Christmas and the revelation of Jesus to the Three Kings.

      Watching mass online in our “bare” house got me thinking about Mary and Joseph.

      What was it like for them to watch other people meet their baby? They knew who they were raising. They knew who their baby was. I wonder what it was like for them to witness how others received him, better yet to watch how others RECOGNIZED Jesus.

      The Star – Were Mary and Joseph aware of the unusual bright light announcing the Light of the world?

      The Shepherds – They had no status or wealth or place in their world but found themselves at the right place because they listened. We always focus on the fact Jesus was announced to shepherds in a field, that their nature (being outcast and unloved) reveals Jesus heart. But, we need to also remember Jesus was announced by a host of Angels, singing in the heavens, breaking through the dark of night; revealing Jesus power.

      The Three Kings – Men of wealth and status; traveling from Persia, following maps and calculations leading them to a star, bearing gifts to meet the King of Kings. When they arrived, they knelt before the baby. Mary-who had been pondering all these details in her heart- was her heart bursting at this point? She had said yes to bearing the shame of gossip about her pregnancy. And now Kings on bended knee, were bowing in vindication of her obedience and revelation. Did Joseph stand there in shocked gratitude?

      Now that Christmas is all wrapped up, The Epiphany begs us to look to Jesus.

      So, would you take a moment for some quiet & look to Jesus?

      Posted in JANUARY 2021, Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged Angels, Christmas, Epiphany, How the Light Gets In, Isaiah 60:1-5, Jesus, Joseph, Light, Mary, Shepherds, We Three Kings
    • Day 28: Introducing

      Posted at 9:01 am by How the Light Gets In, on November 28, 2020

      I feel ready now. You should too. For 27 days, we’ve been looking for how the light gets in. Our hearts and minds and eyes and ears have all been in training for the next step. And it starts tomorrow.

      Advent means “the arrival of a notable person, thing or event.” In other words, Advent is INTRODUCING the light.

      INTRODUCING

      Jesus.

      All along, the sunbursts, sunsets, candle glows, light switches; the way we looked for them and found them or they found us and were dependable and beautiful and magical and powerful and small and overwhelmingly huge – it was always leading us to Jesus.

      Advent is about honoring the God made man, King born as a baby. Advent tells us about the star in the night sky signaling to 3 wise men where to find the King of Kings. And when they followed it, they found their way through the dark and doubt to a manger revealing Jesus. Their story alone about following their heart and ancient writings reminding us that faith is more than a tradition but action too. Advent is a time for reflecting on how you’ve seen light these past few weeks and to keep that going. It takes 21 days to make a habit, we just went beyond that together. So, if you need to see more than a changing in your patterns, if you need a transformation; you can start now. This is the time of year to remember those words, “God so loved YOU that He sent His only Son.” It wasn’t enough that God would be an Old Testament tale, He sent Jesus for us. And he promises us to go ahead of us, surrounding us in our pasts, present and futures. We are human beings and life offers many ways to break us, doesn’t it? Those stories in the Gospels of Jesus healing hurt and broken people are true. He didn’t stop there. I am living testimony to that. He isn’t done. Jesus is the Peace filtering through the noise of the world with truth. The story of Jesus goes beyond the pages of an old book, spreading love for all. Cable networks pack on layer upon layer of lies, wrapped in their own spin. We are living in a culture determined to spread misinformation and cancel anything and everything. Why not use this season to turn the tv off for a bit and read through the story of Jesus? Matthew, Mark, Luke and John all offer their own perspective. Allow the details and differences to be an unveiling of the connection He wants with you. Through this month, together we’ve seen God’s word distinguishing, challenging and nourishing our hearts. To think that the same God who pushed up mountains and knows every star by name didn’t arrive in a robe, surrounded by lights, wielding a scepter but would come to save us through an unassuming baby… I mean. It’s that kind of gentle power I want leading my life. Do you remember my “banana butt” story? Our God is so old and powerful and real and here that He sees every detail of your life and mine, delighting in them to dazzle us. Jesus is God’s way of reaching us on this Earth. Jesus was both human and God. He came to give us an example of how to live. It is our holy obligation to keep shining His truth and light for ALL to see and feel welcome. You are made in God’s image. Therefore, if He is light, you are light. Do you know that? Do you own that? That should make you stand taller knowing you bear the image of a beautiful, spectacular God. So, image-bearer, use this time to read and hear more of God’s word for you, about you, over you. It’s time for your heart to start thumping with the reviving knowledge of who your God is. If this time of year is heavy for you, a friendship with Jesus might be just the comforting you need. Jesus is a master of holding space for you; only stepping in when you want, asking good questions and praying for you all the while. There is a calling for you to come closer. Jesus, the Light of the world, is beckoning for your heart. Can you hear Him? If it feels stunning, sit with it. Take a deep breath and let it all sink in, igniting the fire you were born to share. My gosh.

      Allow me to introduce Jesus.

      Blessing, Teaching, Listening, Loving, Defeating, Healing, Inspiring, LIVING

      Jesus.

      Posted in November 2020, Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged Advent, Beckoning, Challenging, Changing, Comforting, Delighting, Distinguishing, Filtering, healing, Holding Space, HONORING, How the Light Gets In, Igniting, introducing, Jesus, leading, Light, Nourishing, Reaching, Reflecting, reminding, Revealing, Reviving, Shining, signaling, Spreading, Stunning, surrounding, Unassuming, Unveiling
    • Day 26: Igniting

      Posted at 8:48 am by How the Light Gets In, on November 26, 2020

      Day 26, the light comes in igniting a flame.

      IGNITING

      The blue flame kicks in to heat up a large pot. I throw in some butter to melt down and then add the turkey bits, a few shallots, carrots, celery stalks. It’s the big bunches of fresh rosemary, thyme, sage and parsley that are my favorite. Once all the ingredients have a nice crisp on the outside, I pour in lots of water and let that come to a boil.

      Just like that, Thanksgiving begins.

      All those ingredients in one large pot with the blue flames beneath send off a wave of aromas that stir up just about every emotion possible in my busy heart.

      I am an emotional being. I am fully aware. And I could easily, no doubt write on and on about alllllllllll the emotions but we won’t go there.

      One flame sets off so much.

      What are you IGNITING in your heart today?

      One memory for you: I remember walking up to the teller just wanting to make a a deposit. Miss Ruth asked me if I’d been crying. I was in a lot of pain that day and her sweetness was too much for me. My mouth fell into a frown and the tears came. I nodded my head & admitted to crying, while actually crying. I was hurting and angry but trying to convince myself maybe (?) – I said to her, “God is good.”

      “All the time,” she said.

      “God is good, all the time.”

      I looked at her and she was looking right back at me through the plexiglass. “Andrea, God is good all the time.” Miss Ruth was going through cancer treatments and was encouraging me. I’ll never forget that.

      When you know pain, you speak with a different authority. Her words were direct, true, loving and generous. Her light set me off on a path to repeat those words to myself and see if they were true.

      Friends.

      God is good all the time.

      Posted in November 2020, Uncategorized | 1 Comment | Tagged Flame, God is good all the time, How the Light Gets In, Igniting, Thanksgiving
    • Day 25: Stunning

      Posted at 9:54 am by How the Light Gets In, on November 25, 2020

      Day 25, the light comes in STUNNING but not the way you might expect…

      STUNNING

      Together, we’ve seen coral sunsets and bursts of light cutting through fog. But we’re going to try something different.

      Listening to light is stunning.

      It’s like a symphony
      Just keep listening
      And pretty soon you’ll start
      To figure out your part
      Everyone plays a piece
      And there are melodies
      In each one of us
      Oh it’s glorious

      The lyrics shine because words hold power and light.

      Hearing music or listening to stories can pull our thoughts with such intensity. They bring back memories. They remind us, teach us, point us, encourage us, warn us.

      The Bible is full of stories. Jesus taught with stories.

      This past week, I had to look up Hebrews 11 for some bible study homework (Priscilla Shirer, The Armor of God – dang).

      This particular chapter is called the “Hall of Faith” – here’s why:

      Hebrews 11 HALL OF FAITH
      Hebrews 11 HALL OF FAITH

      “By Faith” men and women from the Old Testament went through some stuff, right? And then Jesus comes along and connects the Old Testament history to his “walk the walk” practices. And now you and I get to read the history, learn the practices, bumble and walk and succeed and fail and SHARE OUR STORIES. When we connect and share our stories (not just the wins but the losses too) we are linking arms and moving forward “by faith” in light.

      And

      THAT

      takes

      my

      breath

      away.

      Open your ears and listen for the light today.

      Choose the stories you share at the Thanksgiving table to connect and empower and entertain those around you. And share them

      Posted in November 2020, Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged Armor of GOd, David Archuleta, Glorious, Hall of Faith, Hebrews 11, How the Light Gets In, Inspired: Slaying Giants Walking on Water and Loving the Bible Again, Jesus, Lifeway, priscilla shirer, Rachel Held Evans, Stunning
    • Day 24: Beckoning

      Posted at 11:03 am by How the Light Gets In, on November 24, 2020

      Day 24; the light comes in beckoning.

      BECKONING

      I like this word. There are layers to it. It’s thick with invitation and calling and it’s warm and intentional. I like words. I really like this word.

      The days are darker now, literally. So, when I see the sun shining on the creek; I take notice. It beckons my attention long enough for my heart to be grateful & my hands to take this picture.

      Don’t you just want to follow it?

      The days are also darker now figuratively. SO hearing, seeing, feeling the beckoning of light can be harder. The light is always beckoning.

      Sometimes I need the invitation spelled out for me.

      If today is one of those days for you; listen up.

      There is an invitation waiting just for you.

      Jesus is beckoning:

      What do you want me to do for you? Come and See… All I have is yours. Don’t be afraid just believe. Don’t worry. I am with you always. YOU are the light of the world. Shine!

      -Mark 10:51, John 17:10, Mark 5:36, Mark 4:35, Matthew 28:20 & 5:14-16

      Posted in November 2020, Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged Beckoning, How the Light Gets In, invitation, John 17:10, Mark 10:51, Mark 4:35-41, Mark 5:36, Matthew 28:20, Matthew 5:14-16, Shine Your Light Baltimore
    • Day 23: Holding Space

      Posted at 7:44 am by How the Light Gets In, on November 23, 2020

      Day 23; the light comes in holding space for differences.

      HOLDING SPACE

      The rising moon & the setting sun linger together across one sky.

      Their respective lights doing what they were created to do: The night holds rich darkness and rest and quiet. And, the day takes the hustle and noise and heat away with it.

      Both are able to hold space together in this moment. The delicate beginning of the moon and the blazing sun – their lights are not comparable, they are not competitive. They are both necessary and good.

      “Rivers do not drink their own water; trees do not eat their own fruit; the sun does not shine on itself and flowers do not spread their fragrance for themselves. Living for others is a rule of nature. We are all born to help each other. No matter how difficult it is… Life is good when you are happy; but much better when others are happy because of you.”

      Pope Francis

      At the start of this Thanksgiving week and the end of my search for how the light gets in; I’m grateful for this lesson written in the heavens.

      Posted in November 2020, Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged Heaven, How the Light Gets In, Moon, Nature, Pope Francis, Sun
    • Day 22: Comforting

      Posted at 8:23 am by How the Light Gets In, on November 22, 2020

      Day 22; Honey shows us how comforting the light can be.

      The old girl reminds me how warm and enveloping light feels. Every day she seeks out the brightest spot and basks in the warmth of it.

      COMFORTING

      Random transition here but – I used to think it was bad to write in my Bible. I thought it somehow disrespected the book or God. Or maybe I just thought it looked messy? Either way. My Bible was crisp and clean.

      Not anymore. Scriptures are underlined, highlighted and circled. There are dates and names scribbled all over it.

      To flip through my Bible and devotionals and read through it all is powerful for me. To then sit with the scriptures that held meaning in the moment feels like basking in comforting light.

      …this was a rough time

      I was bitter (and confused and angry) because of all we were going through as a family. I thought I’d been a good Christian and deserved a smooth life because of it.

      Oh, how much I’ve learned and am learning… God is not transactional. This world is broken. Just because I’m a good Jesus follower doesn’t guarantee an easy ride. God is all-powerful but still very present in the most precise of details in my own little life and I’ll never get over it.

      Hezekiah turned his face to the wall and prayed to the Lord, “Remember Lord, how I have walked before you faithfully and with whole hearted devotion and have done what is good in your eyes.” And Hezekiah wept bitterly. Before Isaiah had left the middle court, the word of the Lord came to him. “Go back and tell Hezekiah this is what the Lord the God of your father David says, “I have heard your prayer and seen your tears; I will heal you.”

      2 Kings 20:2-6

      I held onto that promise for another two years.

      Then there’s this. Haha.

      Lily’s scribbled inspiration circa 2016

      Find a cozy, quiet spot and read this from Isaiah 30:15-21.

      Find your strength today sitting in quiet stillness. Let the comforting truth that no matter which way you turn, an all-powerful God is beside you whispering the way to go.

      Posted in November 2020, Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged 2 Kings 20:2-6, Bible, Comforting, Hezekiah, How the Light Gets In, Isaiah 30:15-21, Jesus Calling, Streams in the Desert
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